Letting go

Benjamin Shunkwiler

May 18, 1978 – July 10, 2010

I can’t count the number of times I have been greeted by this delightful smile over the years, but I can tell you it brightened my day every time.  Most days, the smile was accompanied by a “Hiiiiiii Beckie, how was your day?” And no matter how boring my story, he’d listen intently and make me feel like I was the most interesting person in the world.  

Ben was a mainstay around our house, my husband’s best friend and constant companion.  Hunting, fishing, concerts and campfires – you name it – Ben and Jay had more fun and experiences to pack into a lifetime.  Spring, Summer, Winter or Fall, they would travel to the great North – to them the greatest place on earth.  They were kindred spirits and much more like brothers than friends.  Ben looked up to Jay – and Jay got a huge kick out of Ben.  He often joked that whenever Ben walked in to the room, it became the “Ben Show,” because he lit up the room and made sure everyone had fun.  Everything he did was big and fun and full of energy.

We were so happy when Ben met Sara – he took no time at all to realize she was his dream girl and marry her.  In true Ben style, their wedding was a three-day weekend event in the north, where we had the pleasure of bonding with their families as they were joined together.  I’ve never met a couple so well suited for one another.  A Wisconsin native, Sara grew up loving the outdoors.  She liked to fish AND don her camouflage, grab a book and hang out with Ben in his deer blind (while I stayed inside scrapbooking).   She grew to cherish his beloved cottage “John’s Buckhorn Lodge” as much as he did and took great care of it.

The four of us shared many happy times together.  Jay and Sara were the quiet ones and Ben and me the gabbers…so if you witnessed us at the dinner table, you would think Jay and Sara were watching a tennis match as they watched Ben and me “lobbing” comments back-and-forth. 

We rang in every New Year together and enjoyed vacation time.  We went to New York the summer before last and had the time of our lives.  This photo was taken at a Yankees game – one of the last in the old stadium.  Ben was so proud that he scored the tickets for us.  After the game, we hung out at a neighborhood bar, sang and danced the night away with the Yankee and visiting Minnesota Twins fans.

Just four months ago, Ben learned that he had Stage 4 Lymphoma.  Several large tumors were invading his body and the fight began.  He handled the news with grace and was determined to remain positive and beat this awful disease.  Always a well-informed man, he started exhaustive research about his cancer and how to fight it.  He kept everyone around him positive and hopeful that he could win the battle.  As time went by, the fight became harder and harder.  Hope never wavering as been became weaker.  His family and my husband rallied around him providing constant care and support.  

Every morning, the first thing Jay would do is call, text or visit Ben and help him with anything he or Sara needed.  He wanted him to know he was there and would do anything for him.  They had a wonderful bond and watching their friendship while Ben fought for his life was heartwarming and inspiring.  The gift of true friendship is precious and rare and they were so blessed to have it.

Ben lost his battle last week and we are truly lost without him.  How do you let go of this 32-year-old bright light?  How does a wife let go of her husband of nearly 5 years?  How does a best friend let go of the buddy that was a part of best times of his life?  How do two sisters let go of their big brother?  And how do parents let go of their firstborn child?  It all seems unimaginable.  “Big Ben, Benny, The Kid – the guy described by his dad as someone who “attacked life” – How do you let go of him? 

The answer is, you never do.  We will carry him with us always and he will walk with us when we need him.  He will still make us laugh and always inspire us.  Ben’s smile has gone up to Heaven, but it is forever in our hearts.

Farewell for now, Benny.  We love you so. 

Independence Day Style

 

Every year I look forward to the long weekend, relaxation and patriotism that comes with the Fourth of July. 

All across the country, friends get together for backyard barbeques and lake dwelling and communities gather for fun events and activities surrounding beautiful fireworks displays.  No matter where you celebrate our country’s independence, you can bet you will find people decked out in their red, white and blue best (a scrapbooker’s dream come true).

When it comes to wardrobe, I like a more subtle approach to patriotism (flags in moderation, please).  This time of year, red, white and blue can be found aplenty, making the possibilities endless for a chic summer look in honor of this great country. 

I love this cute red & white striped tube dress from Ruche (which by the way, if you're a lover of vintage inspired flirty pieces, this site should be on your favorites list).  The wide navy blue band at the waist and two half-moon pockets (trimmed in navy ruffles and domed buttons) are the perfect touch.  Did I mention this dress is under $40?

 This sweet little dress by PEARLandWOLF on Etsy, is perfect for a cookout with friends.  The design features straps that wrap and tie in many ways, creating a variety of looks.  The best part of this dress – the curtain lace hem.  So pretty! 

My favorite look is the one at the top of the page from Shabby Apple designer Kathleen Dougherty.  It has a classic elegance to it, while also being fun and flirty.  It’s surprising details – piping at the shoulders and a peek-a-boo pleat rising at the waist – make this one a must have.  Paired with red wedges and you’ve got perfect patriotic chic. 

Accessories are key for completing the holiday look. 

This adorable white headband from Ruche is handmade with vintage lace – such a pretty way to sweep your hair back on a hot summer day.

And what about adding interest with red, white and blue shoes?  These lovelies are all from Anthropologie.

Last but not least, your Independence Day style isn’t complete without a pretty necklace.  Here are just a few of the many pieces I discovered on my search – along with a delicate little brooch made of wool felt, for the girl that wants to keep it simple.

 

Have a happy, safe and healthy 4th – and enjoy every minute with your precious family and friends!

Trend Watch: Crochet Chic

I’m an old fashioned girl with a love of fashion and the craft of design. 

Each season I’m in awe of what designers are inspired by and how they interpret emerging trends.  We can thank fashion powerhouses Chanel, Dolce & Gabbana and Issey Miyake for elevating crochet to a new level of chic this past Spring, by highlighting the humble art in their runway collections.  The trend continues to be one of Summer’s must haves. 

I’m not at all surprised to see this craft making a resurgence of popularity.  Women are craving unique pieces that give them a sense of nostalgia with a modern twist.  Crochet is rooted in the past, when women would create beautiful things for their homes and their loved ones.  People are drawn to handmade items that are uncommon and special.  The success of stores like Anthropologie and the Etsy community are a testament of that.   

Crochet style has evolved in a sophisticated, romantic and delicate way - far from it’s chunky, craft fair look of the past.  You can find it on everything from shoes to jackets, but I am in love with the stunning jewelry out there created by incredibly talented artisans.  A search for “crocheted jewelry” on Etsy will unearth hundreds of special pieces – with something for everyone.  It was nearly impossible to choose only a few to highlight for this post, so I encourage you to spend time sifting through the amazing pieces. 

One of my favorites is this romantic cuff bracelet by Whiteswallow.  It’s hand crocheted from natural handspun wool yarn and decorated with a handmade satin fabric flower, containing 3 faux pearls in the middle and it’s fastened with a vintage mother of pearl button.

Other standouts include these pretty necklaces, also found on Etsy.  The first is a vintage floral design by Seaworthysend and the second is a crocheted bib-style necklace by Fancifuldevices that really makes a statement. 

I also adore these charming hoop earrings with crocheted roses by BiKay and the pretty headband by Parvana.

   

 

I prefer a more subtle appearance for crochet on clothing – like this feminine, lightweight vest from Anthropologie.  The styling of this piece here is casual and fresh for summer – but the best thing is I can envision it in many other ways.  Great find.  Also found at Anthropologie is a sweet sweater by Moth, with crocheted flowers adorning the collar.  It makes a great layering piece over dresses or with a tee and jeans.

Have I inspired you to find a crocheted piece of your own yet?

Celeb Style: Jessica Biel

 Jessica Biel’s Classic Beauty

As a longtime fan of actress Jessica Biel, I’ve enjoyed watching her style evolve over the years.  As a teen star, she carried a pretty girl/tomboy image wearing mostly jeans and tees.  Over the years, she has transformed into a stunning trendsetter that fashion lovers flock to for inspiration and designers swoon over to wear their garments. 

From casual to glam, she rarely misses.  A few of my favorite looks:

    

 

 

 

Jessica’s best accessory…Justin Timberlake

Fashion Group International RD Conference

At the beginning of May, I traveled to New York City for Fashion Group International’s annual Regional Director’s Conference.  Each year, the group gathers its Directors and key board members to hear from dynamic speakers, discuss timely industry topics and to connect with other chapters to talk about challenges and opportunities facing our regions. 

This year, the theme “Survival of the Fittest….Navigating the New Economy,” was relevant for all of us.  Speakers and panelists included: Ruben and Isabel Toledo; Kate Greene, VP of Marketing, Givaudan; Lynne Ronon, HSN; Heather Kaminetsky, Director of Internet Marketing, Barney’s; Denise Seegal, FashInvest; Andrew Dent VP, Library and Materials Research, Material ConneXion, Inc.; Harry Slatkin, Slatkin & Company; Frances Cole Jones, author “How to Wow”; Sharon Graubard, SVP Trend Analysis, Stylesight; Milan Milasinovic, Dean of Graduate and Continuing Education at LIM.  To top that off, we had a delightful tour of the latest installation at Museum at FIT from Dr. Valerie Steele, and a dinner and Merit Awards presentation at the historic Cosmopolitan Club. 

What I enjoy most about this conference is meeting the most dynamic, creative, intelligent and inspiring women, who are all pursuing their dreams in the fashion industry.  Each has a unique personality and an interesting story of entrepreneurship and business success.  Following are just a small few of the women I had the pleasure of spending time with at the conference (in addition to my outstanding board members – Elizabeth Kincaid-White and Bethany Beckham who were with me at the conference and who I failed to capture any photos of??!)   

With my FGI Chicago friends, Monique Kielar and Susy Damon

 Love the girls from FGI Kansas City, Laura McGrew and Carman Stalker

L-R: Tarah Perini, Seattle; Anne Agoren, London; Susan Aleveshere, Seattle; Shelley Kidwell, St. Louis; Monique Kielar and Susy Damon, Chicago

These inspiring women, and all the talented people I meet in Detroit are the reason I love being a part of FGI.  I’m so proud to be leading the Detroit chapter and look forward to our group continuing to bring timely fashion information and business intelligence to Detroit’s rising talent.

If you haven’t looked in to membership with FGI yet, I encourage you to attend one of our upcoming networking events – its a great way to get to know us and see how we can help you grow your business or connect with other industry professionals (in Detroit and globally).

Find us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter @fgidetroit.    

Meeting Isabel and Ruben Toledo

“Clothes tell our history.  I wanted to be a part of the history of how we look.”

Isabel Toledo

at FGI Conference, NYC - on why she became a fashion designer

Last week I attended the Fashion Group International Director’s Conference in New York City, where I had the pleasure of meeting Ruben and Isabel Toledo (me with them above).  I have long admired their incredible work and creative force in the industry, but having met them I’ve gained an even deeper respect.  They greeted the audience with grace, humor and appreciation, treating all of us as friends. 

Ruben and Isabel are true visionaries with an innovative spirit that drives everything they do.  They have a deep love of art, their craft and “discovery” everyday.  

Isabel is a technical genius in fashion design, known for her industrial style, skilled construction and draping.  Her designs start with a feeling – expressing an emotion or responding to a fabric.  She loves shape and imagining what it will do on the body, which is evident in the non-traditional way she works with a form (sometimes she’ll turn it upside down). 

She describes her style as an odd twist on Victorian, with proper form and fitted shape.  If you bring something original and sincere to your design – the original ingredient is what people will take in.

I admire Isabel’s grounded approach to her business.  She is an artist that designs because of her love of clothing and the “Art of the Make.”  To that end, she focuses on what she is good at and presenting it in her way – staying out of the spotlight.  She purposely keeps her staff small – 25-30 people – where at times Ruben still answers the phone and their 85-year-old dad remains their best cutter.  Keeping the staff intimate also allows them to remain exclusive because they truly can’t produce a lot.  She wants to have time to create a legacy for the future in fashion – something that will stand the test of time and not marketed in a mass way.   

A highlight of her career came not too long ago when Michelle Obama wore her design to the Inauguration.  The dress, a pale-yellow brocade shift and jacket, was made of Swiss wool lace and lined with a "secret layer” of pashmina tulle inside (a thoughtful touch for warmth on that frigid day).  When Isabel spotted Mrs. Obama on CNN wearing the dress, she was “floating.” Isabel says that she was so committed to that piece and wanted that optimism to come through in the garment.  She was thrilled that Mrs. Obama felt what she did when she created it and selected it for this momentous event.  She believed in it and wanted so much to be a part of that moment in history.  

Ruben’s art has delighted the fashion world with it’s whimsical perspective on the human figure.  He believes that a good fashion illustration will make clothes look even more wondrous than any model could ever convey.  For over 10 years, Ruben’s illustrations have been the face of Nordstrom  designer advertising campaigns.  I have been such an admirer of his work over the years that I’ve become a “collector.”  I’m sure I have most of his Nordstrom ads as well as other illustrations I’ve loved.  While Ruben and Isabel were speaking at our conference, I took the opportunity to tell him about my collection and admiration of his work.  I felt a little like a schoolgirl afterward, but I’m glad I did it.  His eyes lit up with genuine appreciation and he was very engaged in my little tale. 

Following are examples of Ruben’s Nordstrom ads, a portrait of his wife and a sketch of the First Family in Isabel’s designs that he was asked to create for a story. 

  

What struck me most about this dynamic couple is their adoration of one another.  Both born in Cuba, Isabel and Ruben met while attending high school in New Jersey, where Ruben describes meeting Isabel as "love at first sight."  They married soon afterward, and entered the New York fashion world almost immediately.  

The Toledo’s have an inspiring love story.  They are passionate about their life and each other – and its palpable. 

They genuinely adore each other, they laugh at and with each other and they inspire each other creatively.  When asked what designers they admired, Ruben immediately and enthusiastically pointed to Isabel and said “I admire this one.”

I'm convinced that if all couples were as connected as they are, we would have world peace. 

Fashion Friday: Congrats to Seth Aaron

 “Hard work and love for what you do pays off” 

Seth Aaron Henderson

Wow, what a great Project Runway finale!  Seth Aaron pulled off a big win with a fun, yet sophisticated collection.  Although his designs don’t really fit my style, he has been one of my favorites this season.  What I enjoy about him is his amazing creativity and consistency in the voice of his work.  And…he is a NICE guy!  Fashion is a tough business and his warm and vivacious personality really stands out.

I can’t really say the same about Emilio.  No doubt that guy is talented, but I wouldn’t buy a stitch of clothing from someone that arrogant.  For a fella as close to his mom as he seems, she could've done a better job teaching him a little about  being humble.  

Mila was cool and will be successful, but not a showstopper.  Her work with the final collection was clearly amped up by stylists, because it looked far more interesting than most of her work throughout the season. 

The judges were spot on with this one.  Seth Aaron made an impeccable collection of whimsical yet sophisticated clothes,  that in my opinion were reminiscent of Moschino Cheap and Chic, and were ripe for editorial.

I’m not sure I’d ever wear anything of his, but I will sure appreciate its divine craftsmanship. 

Seth Aaron’s collection was graphic and bold with just enough vibrant color and was inspired by 1940s German and Soviet military.  It sounds interesting and it WAS interesting.  I can’t wait to see more of what he has to offer. 

 

Is it time for the next season of Project Runway yet?  I’m ready!